Good God! Joke. The Harley Davidson Facts...

                                The Harley-Davidson Facts                                  

The inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle, Arthur Davidson , died and went to heaven.

At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur, 'Since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want to in heaven.'  Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said, ' I want to hang out with God.'  St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne room, and introduced him to God.  God recognized Arthur and commented, 'Okay, so you were the one who invented the Harley-Davidson motorcycle?' 

Arthur said, 'Yeah, that's me...'

God commented: 'Well, what's the big deal in inventing something that's pretty unstable, makes noise and pollution and can't run without a road?'  Arthur was a bit embarrassed, but finally spoke, 'Excuse me, but aren't you the inventor of woman?'  God said, 'Ah, yes.'  'Well,' said Arthur, 'professional to professional, you have some major design flaws in your invention!

1. There's too much inconsistency in the front-end suspension.

2. It chatters constantly at high speeds.

3. Most rear ends are too soft and wobble about too much.

4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust.

5. The maintenance costs are outrageous!!!!

'Hmmmmm, you may have some good points there,' replied God, 'hold on.'

God went to his Celestial supercomputer, typed in a few words and waited for the results. The computer printed out a slip of paper and God read it.  'Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed,' God said to Arthur, 'but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours'.

A Motorcycle Comedian is Born

It's rare when a motorcycle comedian is born.

I had the good fortune to become acquainted with Jack Riepe on my old forum a few years back. Jack is a true wit. With no preparation whatsoever, Jack is capable of spitting out one-liners and stories that keep you and anyone standing near you, in stitches.

Jack is the author of Politically Correct Cigar Smoking For Social Terrorists, a book on men's sensitivity. He had not written much on motorcycles except for occasional work on the forum where he posted some of the most humorous motorcycle stories imaginable.

When planning was underway for the 2006 BuRP Rally to be held in Maggie Valley, NC, Jack decided he wanted to attend. BuRP is a small rally close to the Blue Ridge Parkway. It's run by forum members and attracts riders from all over the United States. We all looked forward to the rally to see Jack in person.

I know that often a funny guy in person doesn't write funny things on paper. Similarly, someone who is funny in print, often is pretty dull in person.

Fortunately, Jack turned out to be funny in person and funny in print.

Check out my BuRP Motorcycle Rally Day-by-Day Blog for 2006 to see my recollections and pictures of BuRP 2006. They are sprinkled with comments and pictures about Jack.

Now Jack has begun his own blog, Twisted Roads, specializing in motorcycle stories with a heavy dose of humor.

Jack's blog has recently given his take on the 2006 BuRP Rally discussing his complete trip, the people he met at the rally, and all the funny things that happened.

You owe it to yourself to read Jack's Twisted Roads blog. You have my personal guarantee that you'll be laughing all the way through.

Picture of Jack Riepe © 2006-2008 Walter F. Kern. All rights reserved.

A preview into the weekend, and a Friday Funny

If weather permits, I'll be going on my first biker run of the season. I missed the first big one here this year due to cruddy weather. I will do my best to get some good pictures and post them next week sometime. I don't typically post on the weekends, so untill next week, I give you my Friday Funny.







I've got a pretty good biker joke that a friend sherry Hoskins from Stormy Custom Bike Works shared with me.


The gynecologist:

A gynecologist had become fed up with high cost of malpractice insurance and was on the verge of being burned out. Hoping to find another career where skillful hands would be beneficial, he decided to make a major career change and become a Harley mechanic. He found out from the local community college what was involved, signed up for classes and learned all he could. When the time for the practical exam approached, the former gynecologist prepared carefully for weeks and completed the exam with tremendous skill. When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had scored 150%. He called the instructor, saying "I don't want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wondered if there was an error." The instructor said, "During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark. You also put the engine back together perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark." The instructor went on to say, "I gave you that extra 50% because you did all of it through the muffler."